I know I’m not the only one….

I know I’m not the only person that buys tons of household items. I just know it. Okay let’s go back. I was raised by my granny and she kept a basement full of EVERYTHING, literally. Food, household items, towels, sheets, socks, barrettes, remember those?, baby dolls, rollers, you name it the overflow was in the basement. I’ve never had a house with a basement so I’ve always shopped like my grandmother but instead I used my laundry room, bathrooms, kitchen, and linen closet for storage. 🤷🏽‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️.

I have three babies. There was no way I was going to go to the store for things of that nature every week. Not to mention school supplies. So I always. I repeat always bought in bulk. Okay fast forward. All my babies are grown and I live by myself. I can’t stop buying in bulk.

Okay here are pictures of the laundry room. I can’t stand to see an empty space. So this picture tells me I need to go shopping. Can you guess for what item(s)?

One half of the shelf in the laundry room!
I see spaces….😡😡😡

Empty spaces gives me headaches but I’m trying to not do this anymore. Every time my babies come by they take stuff with them. I say no and no one listens. That bothers me. My oldest son says I’m a consumer. Well, perhaps! And.

I’m redoing my bathroom in my master and I don’t want to have a lot of clutter moving forward but who wants to run downstairs every so often to replenish? Upstairs under one of my sinks look like this.

So this is one side of the sink. The other side is all hair products!

I want to do better but I promise my head hurts when I’m not fully stocked. It’s like a safe haven for me. If you come to my house I may not have food for you. But you won’t need nothing else but your clothes. I have towels. Sheet sets. Tooth brushes and hair combs and any personal hygiene item you’ll ever need. Oh and plenty water.

My daughter tells me I’m OCD. I believe I’m Sandra, Pennie Merle Ficklin little Mini Me. I do think I need to do better but I’m sure I won’t.

Be honest. Who else has this problem? Do you want help or you’re good as is? As always be encouraged.

Water

Every morning I try to drink at least four 16 FL.OZ of water at room temperature. I do this one to hydrate myself. You know the water you drink today is actually for your body tomorrow. I also do this to flush myself out daily. I shared a post about your urine color and I’m obsessed with my urine color. I love mine to be clear clear. I don’t like seeing any yellow. In my opinion yellow urine has a smell to it and I don’t like a scent coming from me unless it smells sweet. Also water helps my skin stay pretty and clear. It helps with my natural hair too. When I lay off my water I surely see the difference as well as I smell the difference.

Now the room temperature water is something I just like. I don’t know if it has any health benefits to it but I don’t like cold water nor do I like cold air. So I believe it’s just a personal preference. Throughout the day I try to drink as much water as possible. I’d say when I’m working I drink between 8-12 bottles of water a day. My weakness is the Starbucks Strawberry refresher. If I have that I normally never make it to the 12 bottles. So the goal is to stay away from Starbucks.

Thanks to life, and trust I’m not complaining, I’m not getting any younger. I have to be more diligent about taking care of myself. I even starting back lifting my weights again last Saturday. I’m starting back slowly. I’m doing three reps of various arm drills. Next week I’ll add in abs with hopes of starting back running and walking next month. Plus the weather is about to be beautiful and I have to be able to wear these new tennis dresses that I love to wear. That’s always a motivator for me.

What do you do as a daily morning ritual that helps start your day? List them below so I can see what I can add to mine. As always be encouraged.

Urine Colour & Health

Urine Colour & Health

Urine Colour & Health
— Read on empress2inspire.blog/2020/02/17/urine-colour-health/

I have ALWAYS paid attention to my urine color and smell. My granny taught me years ago that a woman knows her body by the smell of her urine. Folks think I’m crazy. That’s okay. It’s apart of self care and loving me. Water is essential. I don’t know why bit I fell off my water intake here lately and it showed in my skin, my hair, and of course my urine.

Affirmations

What are they? Why do you need them in your life? How should you use them? Let’s discuss it below!

Affirmations are simply confirmations. Things to help us remember what IS. Like all my life everyone always told me I was beautiful. So on a bad day I always tell myself I’m beautiful. It’s engraved in my head now. It’s a confirmation. It’s me validating myself.

Why do we need them. Sis, I don’t know about you but sometimes folks and situations try to beat me down. Sometimes life frustrates me and that ole mean spirit of depression tries to creep in and I have to get somewhere and remind myself of who I am. So my affirmations do just that. They allow me to look in the mirror and tell myself, “San you are an overcomer”. “ you got the victory”, “child that’s their lost” and whatever else I need to say to keep myself in that positive space. Affirmations keep you positive. Keep you encouraged and uplifted. Makes you realize that you got this. Whatever “this” is. It’s a dangerous state to of mind to think that you 💯 all the time. Now don’t get me wrong Sis we are all of that and some but sometimes we go through. And in those “sometimes” you better have the gospel which has the perfect affirmations for any test of life. But if you don’t believe in the gospel then you better search some good books and find you some words that can bring you up out anything that may come to try to still your joy. That thing can be a person too. Please believe it.

This is what you do. Don’t wait to get down and low. Start your day off with positive thoughts and actions. Nothing like a good prayer. You don’t have to get down on your knees. When I open my eyes in the morning I say, “Thank you Jesus.” I’m always reminded that I’ve never seen this Friday before so it brings about gratitude. From that gratitude I begin think of all the things that I’ve been through and how my Jesus kept me. I begin to pray for my love ones. Most of the times my puppies are right there wanting to go out so I kiss them and tell them I love them. After I get through cleaning my bed up and letting my babies out and feeding them it’s time for personal hygiene. I have a friend guy that laughs because he says it takes me two hours to get dressed. Well it’s a ritual. (see yesterday’s post about self-care). It’s that time that I need for Sandra. When I’m alone I literally say sweet things out loud. I smile even laugh out loud sometimes. If I’m with someone I may not say anything but I’m mindful. I’m thankful.

I love a good 🛀. I can’t wait to finish my bathroom. It’s something about that time in the tub that’s sacred. The part where I lotion myself down is equally important to me. Its time to myself. I touch myself. I feel myself and I’m in sync with me and my emotions. It’s just a beautiful time. During that time those affirmations, confirmations, positive thoughts, feelings, and emotions are essential to the positive day ahead. I promise you sister it’s a beautiful state of being. Try it. And if you’re already doing this let me know in the comments!

Hopefully this short read will help you understand what affirmations are and why I believe they are so important. Get you some. Put them throughout the house. Put them in your journals. Quote them. Get you some favorites and say them daily. Throughout the day if need be. Make them apart of your daily ritual and watch that attitude start adjusting to whatever it is you are positively reinforcing. At the end of the day I want you to be encouraged sisters. Uplifted. Inspired. I want you to go about your daily tasks striving and thriving your way into greatness. You’re not alone. Let affirmations assist you with that. 🥰🥰

The importance of Self-Care

Was lying here just searching my social media accounts before I get up and get situated and I looked at my nails and thought of the topic of self-care. This has been something that I was taught as a young lady to always take care of myself. My granny started taking me to the hair salon when I turned two and I’m almost 50 and it’s a ritual that I’ve always kept up. I don’t go as much now because I rock my natural hair but I still know the importance of it.

Self-care is so important and I believe that it’s essential sisters to us feeling good about ourselves. It’s not easy trying to be the best mom, sister, friend, lover, and every other title we give ourselves. And sometimes our failures or short comings make us feel inferior or less than. This is where self-care becomes an important tool.

I don’t know about you but nothing makes me feel more beautiful than a pimple free face, my hair popping, toes and nails done, and a beautiful dress. I can have $50 to my name and Mista could’ve just hung up on me, or better yet my daughter, she’s faithful for doing that, but when all those pieces are working in my favor I’m feeling like a million bucks. I love it. It’s surely a cloud popper for me.

Sometimes we get discouraged as women. I’m here to tell you during those moments you must practice self-care like never before. I think it’s mandatory to be on a self-care ritual where you dedicate a day or hours of the day to yourself. That can look like meditating, reading, journaling, pampering yourself, walking your puppies, or simply just doing nothing. Whatever it is it needs to be a part of your week just like work or washing your face. Self-care doesn’t always have to involve spending money. I learned a few years ago that coloring, I believe they call it adult coloring, is something else that’s relatively inexpensive and very relaxing.

The goal of self-care is to have something in place that allows you to focus on YOU! After you’ve taken care of Mista, the babies, the puppies, that personal project that you’re dedicated to, the house, whatever it it, you need to focus on YOU. For if you don’t take care of you how in the world can you be there for others and complete other projects effectively.

Sometimes I’ve found myself looking for self-care from others. HUGE mistake. BIG mistake. That can NEVER happen. Sisters it’s your responsibility to make sure that YOU are taken care of spiritually and emotionally. You can’t put that off on others. For if you do you’re sink into a dark place for you’re find out that the other person is not interested or simply just can’t do it. It’s actually selfish to expect that from others.

Often times I try to add a picture to my post but for Self-care, it looks like different stuff to different people. Going to a tennis match is another example of self-care for me. Sis, whatever it is just make sure that you’re taking time out for you. I can’t say it enough. I’ve been called a many of names. Some or even most maybe correct. But at the end of the day San, takes care of herself. Daily. I have a personal hygiene ritual that allows me time to massage myself. To kiss myself on the shoulder. I’m aware of the smell of my body. My breath. I pay close attention to my skin and my teeth. These things are important to me. I eat bad often times and don’t work out like I should but trust me I look at my body daily and I know when to step back and discipline myself. And guess what? I do these things for ME.

Sisters, I promise you won’t regret making time for you. I promise. It’s not selfish it’s vital. It’s essential. It’s a MUST. Share with me what you do for your self-care. Give me some new ideas please. For I love me. And in the last few years I’m learning even the more to do it just that much more! Be encouraged my beautiful sisters!

Oh wait I just thought of a song I use to do step aerobics too. This song makes me love on me. I’m in love with my body. Check it out here.

Happy Sabbath

Good morning, I’m so blessed to see another Saturday that I’ve never seen before. Yesterday I didn’t leave the house. I had no strength nor energy. Today is suppose to be beautiful but I’m going to cover up good and get out the house. I have some errands to run before my procedure on Monday.

I stayed up and watched Serena Williams win her 14th Fed Cup Single match. The girl is something else. She can pull a win off at any given moment but I must admit she doesn’t look the Serena of old. The Serena I traveled the world to watch play this beautiful sport. Nevertheless, I’m still hopeful that she’ll be back this year.

This morning I woke up and as I let my puppies out I said a little prayer just thanking Jesus for my life journeys. Thanking him for my ups and downs. The good and the bad. I apologized for the rut I sunk into on yesterday. I asked for forgiveness and I prayed for my sisters that I know go through so much wanting love from people that will never give it to them either because they can’t or they won’t. I felt a weight lift up off me. I felt refreshed. I felt a sense of peace. My face has been feeling so heavy but I felt light headed after my prayer. That’s probably not good. But when your head has felt like cement has been on it, that feeling was a relief.

Yesterday I was reading a blog post on here were a guy wrote about the difference between men and woman after having sex. He spoke of how men afterwards don’t want to talk and that women do. He mention that women wanted to get “mushy” and he said men just want to lay there and wonder if they did the ultimate. I’m paraphrasing here too. It just made me think how society still today, myself included, accept the stereotype of “most” men as law. I’ve heard my entire life that a “man gone be a man” and if that’s the law. The loaded law at that then how come we as a society can’t accept that “a woman will be a woman”? Like the things that are normal for women. Such things as wanting to be loved, wanting to be protected and provided for. Wanting to feel safe. If we want to be provided for we are gold diggers. If we want to be loved then we’re needy. Not sure if this is just in the black community or not. I’ve never dated nor married outside of my community. These are things that I’ve heard within my community. Men don’t talk much. Well women do. Men don’t like to shop. Well women do. I find this men don’t like to shop stuff a lie. Men don’t like to shop for panties and bras. For dresses. But men love to shop for recreational stuff. I have a friend guy that works hard and just sit around the and think of things to buy. I mean big dollar purchases too. The truth is, yes men and women are wired differently. However the truth also is that we’re both human. We both were created in love and to love and IF we both simply remove the selfish component from our lives I believe there would be happier men and women relationships. I just don’t believe that we as people were created to live alone. So many have to a accept being alone as reality unless they accept the games. The lies. The “I don’t need nobody”, the instability of emotions. Nowadays I believe men have become just as emotional as women. The only difference is men won’t talk about it. They’ll close you off or stop talking to you. Women are convinced themselves that they rather be single then put up a man mess. But they’ll go out and sleep with different men. Men will do the same. In my opinion that sleeping around is too much mess. That talking to 10 different women/men is too much mess. It’s hard to keep up with one. Why add to it? I don’t know.

I don’t have a lot experience with relationships. I’ve only been in four. However I speak with people all the time. Almost daily about their relationships. Every single female has been cheated on by a man that I’ve spoken to. The ones that are married are still with or they stayed with him for years after the infidelity. I see nothing wrong with saving your marriage. I believe it’s the right thing to do if both can make it right and work. I believe in the institution of marriage. I have a lot of respect for it. I just hate that we as women are normally on the receiving end of the damage. Emotionally. Mentally. And spiritually.

My Facebook page of Chatting With San at https://www.facebook.com/chattingwithSan/, post daily quotes, proverbs, affirmations, thoughts, and funnies. I get so many inboxes from females that are broken. I can relate. I’ve been there. I try daily to lift their spirits. Let them know that “this too shall past”. I let them know to keep their heads up. I let them know I’ve been there. I’m over the pain of my ex husband. I consider him a friend now. I know that me and my Mista will be a couple one day. I believe that in my heart. Until then I work on Sandra. I encourage other females. I get my life back on track. Things happens in seasons. I pray to Jesus for what I want and who I want. I speak names. I say exactly what it is I want. Things won’t always happen in my timing, that’s the frustrating part. But I believe if it’s according to Jesus will it’ll be done.

I’m not the independent woman. I don’t want to be alone. I don’t want to date a different man every so often. I’m not going to do that. Not in my DNA. I’ll wait to Mista get his mind together. I’ll wait till my change come. There is plenty to be done in my life right now to keep me focused. I so love being a woman. I don’t want to do what men do. If society thinks it’s okay for men to sleep around and that’s normal so be it. Sleep on. You won’t be sleeping with San. I’ll be doing lady things. You know shopping, going to the spa, watching tennis, going to tea socials, those things that I enjoy. I’ll take selfies in my beautiful dresses. I’ll go on walks with my two beautiful Maltese. I’ll come here and release some of the things going on in my head. Get my toes and nails done. Get my eyelashes done. My brows threaded. All these things are beautiful to me. I’ll continue to message my friend girls and check on them. Pray as much as possible. I even need to start back fasting. I now enjoy washing clothes and folding them away. Thursday I had a doctors appointment. The lady at the front desk says, “ Oh my you smell good, what are you wearing?” I said Gain and softener. I get that all the time now. It makes me smile because I hear Mista saying it.

In closing, to my sisters be true to yourselves. You’re not a man. You weren’t created to be equal with a man in the sense of their might and their mind set. Be the beautiful woman God created you to be. Always walk in your glory with your head held high and your shoulders squared properly. Stop leaning over so much messing up your posture. I see that so much and it vex me. I want to say, “baby straighten your back and shoulders up. I just saw a woman the other day at a nice restaurant in a beautiful hunched over, smh.” Look like a woman. Feel like a woman and most importantly be a woman. Your season is upon you. Don’t fall into the traps that society has highlighted to be okay. Cover your bodies. Take care of your health. Eat right. Exercise. Love. Love those that don’t love you back even the more. I’m here with you. I stand with you. Be encouraged.

Counseling/Theraphy

I really appreciate that I was able to bow down and seek help for myself in 2018. I go back and forward here lately. When I’m feeling high and good I be like, “Long as I got King Jesus, I don’t need nobody else!” But baby when I get down and low I quickly message my counselor crying for an appointment.

Good morning. Just thought I’d share.