Sis be careful who you call Sister. I don’t care if she is your sister from your parent. Sisterhood is PROVEN through valley experiences!
I read a book titled, The Algebra of Happiness by Scott Galloway. I love his writing. I read his first book, The Four, which was a New York Times Best Seller. The only bad thing I’ll say is that he’s an atheist. I’ve always believed that the concept was foolish. For one not to believe that something exist you almost have to believe it does exist. Atheism to me is an oxymoron, you know like a soft brick. For me to say that the grass is not green I have to know what the color green looks like, this the color green is in fact an actual color. So he knows that there is a God. But hey that’s just me. I’m no brain doctor so please don’t beat me up. Remember this is a judge free zone. 🤷🏾♀️🤷🏾♀️🤷🏾♀️. I do love the fact that he likes tennis though. He mention tennis in both of his books when trying to explain something. So I’ve come to the conclusion that he loves tennis. And if he doesn’t oh well this is my blog so it’s true on here. 😜😜😜. I believe he’s a Rafa fan. And that’s cool. I’m a Roger fan but I respect Rafas’ game. 🎾🎾🎾.
Anyways, in this book he says that “Love and relationships are the ends and everything else in between is the means. This resonates with me deeply. I’m an introvert and an extrovert which actually makes me an ambivert. It just depends on the situation and the people involved. I don’t mind being by myself but I don’t want to be alone. And I don’t like being around a lot of people or crowds but I love going to see an artist that I love, perform because I love seeing live bands and music. I totally agree that everything we chase in the end it’s all about love and THE relationships. Even after two failed marriages and losing pretty much everything I’m still going to fight for love and relationships. I love how he’s authentic in the book about his attitudes and his ways. He confesses his flaws. He acknowledges that he needs to work on things and that he really is. He talks about his mental health and his bouts with depression. I think it takes good character and morals to speak of ones perceived short comings. Up until a couple of years ago I would have never told my flaws the way I do now. But I find healing in doing so. It brings about a sense of peace. I feel free. Liberating. I remember when all the black girls where starting to go natural. Everyone kept speaking of it be liberating. I never really felt that about wearing my natural hair. For me as long as when I put myself together I feel cute, I don’t care if it’s natural hair, extensions, or a wig. I just love being cute. 😇😇😇. But writing and blogging about my truth is liberating. It makes me happy. I find joy in it. It’s calming too. It’s like listening to jazz music. Or watching Ken Ford play the violin in person. I simply love it. I wish I could do it more often. I’m sure one day I will. 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽.
He speaks about nothing is ever as bad or as good as it seems. I know this to be true. I’ve been in some bad, terrible, horrible situations. Situations where I wanted to just die. Looking back I can honestly say that it wasn’t that bad. Not until death bad at least. And I’m not discrediting the situations at all. But on this side of them I can see the beauty in them. I can see that I was resilient in the sense that the situations didn’t take me out. I came through. I can still smile and laugh. I can still love and I still want to be loved. You know some people go through things and it takes them under. It changes their entire life. I’m not discrediting that option or outcome. But I’m grateful that I do serve a God that has literally walked with me through it all. He gave me favor amongst my enemies. He allowed me to endure and overcome right before their eyes. Through it all I’m learning true forgiveness. I’m first learning to forgive myself. I held myself accountable for years for something that happened. I felt like I allowed it to happened. I’d talk to my right shoulder and be like I wouldn’t dare allow something like this to happen. But my left shoulder would be accusing me all along. Because I was too saved to realize that I needed help I dealt with it all alone. I’d pray and I’d fast. I’d shop till I drop. I’d go to the spa multiple times a week. You know doing everything but dealing with the situation. It never went away. I was just applying bandaids to it year after year. I walked around like I was cool and over it but my insides were being tormented. This whole authentic thing is so freeing. I love coming here to release. One thing for sure I know I’m not the only person that’s dealing or have dealt with similar things. I promise you one day soon I’ll be able to tell my entire life story with no repercussions.
He says, “Love received is comforting, love reciprocated is rewarding, and love given completely is eternal.” Unconditional love is the goal. I’m sure of it. I don’t know if I’m there yet. As a matter of fact if I’m being authentic, I know I’m not there yet but it’s my goal. Eternal love. To have everlasting love one MUST practice forgiveness and we can’t keep score. It’s a given we’re human. Thus we will make mistakes. So if the love is unconditional than you have to accept those mistakes. I use to say things like, “you’re not gone play me for no fool.” Huh? What does that even mean? 🤔🤔🤔. I’m not advocating lying on your back and just allowing someone to continue to hurt you perpetually. I’m not saying that. But I do believe that unconditional love means that you have to continuously forgive. You have to not keep score. Just as bad as I want unconditional love I also want to be able to give unconditional love. The good book speaks of seeing past the person faults and seeing the need. That’s the place I’m striving to get to. So I’m not preaching to choir. I’m honestly trying to accomplish this stuff myself. And let me tell you it’s not easy. It takes some denying yourself. It takes some calling yourself out on your own bull. It takes being honest and authentic. It takes prayer, fasting, and counseling. It takes picking and choosing your battles. As important as I think I am it’s taking me to not be selfish. Be considerate. Have compassion. Having sympathy and even better having empathy. It takes a lot. Commitment and dedication are key too. I read somewhere that consistency compounds. So it’s a daily practice. We won’t accomplish unconditional love if we don’t work at it daily. You don’t think something as important as unconditional love is going to just fall in our laps do we? Oh noooo. 🙅🏽♀️🙅🏽♀️🙅🏽♀️. Nope! Not gone happen. Somethings we have to take by force. Matthew 11:12. We have to put the work in. So like Betty White says, “anything worth having is worth fighting for.” Or whatever she said. You get the drift. 😇😇😇.
The book was so much more than this. Overall it was an awesome easy read. He draws you in with his authenticity. That’s what makes it so easy to read. I love reading. I read biographies, autobiographies, memoirs, and non-fiction books. I don’t do a lot of novels. I surely don’t read urban or fiction books. It’s enough of that mess right before my eyes. I enjoy books that check me. Make me think. Make me want to do better. Be a better person. Because that’s truly my goal. And this book does just that.
Reading is life altering. As the saying goes, it’s fundamental. Nothing like wrapping up and getting into a good book. So if you’re looking for a guide to happiness. If happiness is your goal I’d highly recommend this book. I’d also consider it a night stand reference tool too. Be encouraged my good people. 🥰🥰🥰
I was told today that I look awesome. That I had a glow about myself. I keep hearing that lately. I’ve been told this by several people, male and female. I don’t know what it means exactly. I look happy? Shiny? I do have oily skin! Regardless to what they mean I’m grateful for the compliment. For if we are comparing June 13th 2018 to June 13th 2019 I surely have something to glow about. I am happy and my face is shiny and it’s my prayer that I continue to glow! 🥰🥰🥰
I’m trying to keep my circle small and eliminate drama in my life. I don’t care who you are if you’re not going to make me laugh or smile I don’t want you in my presence. I no longer care about the fancy houses and cars. I don’t care about the designer shoes and clothes no more. I want love, good love making, tennis, and to travel. Yes I do. Go ahead, judge me. I dont care! 🤷🏾♀️🤷🏾♀️🤷🏾♀️
You know I don’t know if there is such a thing as a real woman or a real man. As compared to what? A fake person? 🤔🤔🤔. Whatever. I’d say I’m going through a growth sprout. I’ve lived a little and learned a lot. I’m still me though. I’m still silly. Loud and very country. Yes ma’am I am. Born and raised on the south side of Chicago but as country as those from deep Mississippi. And I love it. I’ve been blessed my entire life. Inspite of the things I’ve gone through I’ve been fortunate that none of my upheavals have destroyed me. As a matter of fact they’ve made me stronger. Wiser. Taught me compassion. Empathy. Things that I hadn’t always had for people that I didn’t care about. So I thank Jesus for every scare for they’re my testimony.
People say, “San how can you forgive this person or that person for what they’ve done?” My response is the same way Jesus keeps forgiving me. My Lord I mess up everything. If not by action or by speaking then for sure by my thoughts. So it’s so easy for me to forgive now. It’s not always been easy though. I use to cut people off so quick. I’d give them “a piece of my mind” so quickly. Now not so much. Especially if you’re someone I care about. I want to talk it out. Try to reason with you. It just makes more sense to me.
On today I totally feel unbothered. Woke up this morning happy and feeling a sense of peace. I have not one complaint. Regardless to what’s happened or going to happen or what’s happening right now I feel fabulous. Sometimes different little things pop up in my head and I just laugh or smile. Like it just happened. 🤣🤣🤣.
You know I’m a special individual. Literally. My thought process is weird folks may say. I’m Green I’ve been told. Im stuck in another time frame. I think different. I’m old fashion. Yeah I’m all that and I love it. So have your thoughts about me. Who cares? I don’t! I know that I’m a good person. A lot of imperfections and flaws. But a huge heart full of love. Full of hope and encouragement. I believe that’s the glow they see in me. They see that heart of mine. I mean well. Don’t want to hurt no one. Just want to laugh, love, and live. And guess what? I pray that everyone that reads this post do the same. 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽