Trouble Don’t Last Always

Just told someone that and thought I’d come say a few things today. First off let me say that I’m so blessed and thankful to be going to church tonight. I’m going with expectation in my heart because I know I’m going to get a word for my soul tonight. You know just like our natural bodies need food our spiritual bodies need food too and I’m blessed that I’m able to get both.

Okay now about this trouble don’t last always post. It’s true. Nothing last forever. At some point everything comes to an end. Either they/it die or they/it stop. So just knowing that strengthen me. Also having trouble arise is your life is a blessing. I know you maybe reading this like heifer are you crazy? Yes I am but what I’m saying is the truth. Just think about it. If trouble never came your way you’d be stagnant. You’d never move or do something different because in your mind you’ll be thinking everything is okay. Trust me. Been there done that. But when trouble comes it makes you think. It’s uncomfortable. You start moving around. I think most importantly when trouble comes most will call on the name of Jesus. Perhaps out of fear. Nevertheless most do just that, Jesus help me. Be honest. Think about the last time something got under your skin. I’ll wait.

Okay now don’t agree? Didn’t that trouble move you in some direction? I dont know what direction you went in but you moved. I had a close friend guy tell me last summer that we are either in a situation, coming out of a situation, or about to go through a situation. And as I think about it, that’s so true. If you’re able to keep living this is the cycle. Don’t know when but one thing for sure the life cycle is real. So what I’m learning to do is embrace the journey. The one thing I know now that I can control within any situation that I find myself in is my response to the situation. My reaction. How I handle it. That’s what I can control. NOT the life cycle itself. But my response to it is totally in my control.

My people life is awesome. Even when you’re in the lion den, trust me life is awesome. I’ve been there. So I’m not talking about what my grandmother told me. I’m writing from experience.

So I want you to be encouraged on today. Hold your head up high. Walk in your victory. Believe in yourself. Let it go. Forgive.

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Fight

You know all my life I’ve had to fight. Literally. I know that sounds like I’m mimicking Oprah from The Color Purple but I’m not. I fought every Friday on the black top as a child because I was picked on. I thought I was cute, so they’d say. I didn’t wear pants so they’d fight me for that. I thought I was better than others so they’d fight me for that. They’d talk about my momma being on drugs or in and out of jail so I’d get into a fight about that. They’d talk about my grandmother drinking beer so I’d fight about that. It was always something. And back then you better not come home crying talking about somebody beat you up because if you did you’d get a beat down at home and then you’d be walked to the child house and made to fight again. You see everybody knew all the major families in the neighborhood. This was my life coming up on the Southside of Chicago in Englewood.

When I went to high school I didn’t fight as much. I remember fighting a girl once because she said she liked my brother. I drugged her by her hair and as I was fighting her I was talking to her and I told her not to spread that lie. In college of course I was done with this foolishness. But in the Army the south side of Chicago had to come out again. I didn’t physically fight but I had to stand up for myself. You see I’ve always been a tiny person. Long hair, long neck, long arms, and long legs. Just long! 100 pounds soak and wet, literally. So folks thought I was easy. So because I had to stand up for myself soldiers began to think I was mean. I wasn’t mean by my Lord I took NO mess from nobody. πŸ™…πŸΎπŸ™…πŸΎπŸ™…πŸΎ

Once I got out the Army the Lord had began to start working on me and he saved my soul. So the tough “Jones” as my people called me was dying out. My military friend Pam makes no hesitation to call me out when she thinks I’m being weak. Or she don’t understand that the Old Jones is dead. As a matter of fact she doesn’t like it. She chastises me about often. She’d say, “i dont know this Jones.” I woke up this morning feeling like I got my fight back. Feeling like maybe Jones isn’t dead. I’m ready to take back everything that I’ve lost. Now you’d ask me now, “what did you lose? You left out something didn’t you?” Well just keep coming by, the entire story will eventually be told. But for now I have to get it to you it comes up.

You see all my life I’ve been a little different. And guess what that’s okay. My children have always said once I get something in my head it takes an act of Congress to get it out my head. Well that might be true thus the reason why I’m getting my fight back and about to come out swinging. Not physically per se but I’m going to get everything I’ve prayed for because it’s mine. The world, the devil, folks, politics, no one or thing is taking anything from me that’s been awarded to me because I prayed and stood on what I prayed for. Yes I’ll continue counseling because it’s helping me. Yes I’ll still love those that have hurt me. Yes I’ll forgive and help anyone that I can. Don’t take it for a sign of weakness. But I will no longer allow no one or no thing to get in the way of my health, my success, my peace, my joy, my steadfastness, my happiness, my kindness, nor the work that I know I MUST accomplish. Today I’m taking my life back. I’ve laid back and watched as if it was some movie that I was watching and could do nothing about it. The devil is a liar. I’m strong. I’m courageous. I’m an overcomer. I’m victorious. I have the victory. As a matter of fact my name is VICTORY!!!! Hallelujah!!! Praise God. I felt that. My Lord something just went through me and made me shake.

Starting today I’m taking my life back. I’m in control of my destiny. I’m not weak. I’m not crazy, well okay maybe a little but hey, whatever. πŸ€·πŸΎβ€β™€οΈπŸ€·πŸΎβ€β™€οΈπŸ€·πŸΎβ€β™€οΈ. I’m trading my sorrows. I’m trading my sickness. I’m laying it down for the joy of the Lord. Yes it’s a song but it’s in my heart. I got my fight back. Yaaaassss!!! I’ve been through too much NOT to have the victory. You hear me? The things I’ve gone through folks would have given up or died. But I’m still here so I know I’m blessed. As they say too blessed to be stressed. No more game playing. No more sadness. When I look back over my life and ALL that he’s brought me through my soul shouts hallelujah because guess what? It could’ve me. It should’ve of me. But God.

So to my readers rise up today. Be strong and courageous. You got this. We got this. Fight for what’s yours. Don’t just sit back and watch your life as if you’re at the movies and don’t have a part in the production of it. And if you’re on fire one day and cold the next day, so what. Keep on living and if you allowed to see another day get right back up and fight for the fire again. I come today to tell you to fight and be encouraged.

You don’t know my story

A lot of people know of me but very few know me. I like it this way too. What you see is not what you always get with me. I can be a complicated person and sometimes by choice. With that being said I love me some me.

I’ve been through a lot. Perhaps no more than anyone else but I’ve been through a lot. I’ve been so low at times where I wanted to give up the ghost; But God. I’ve also been so high where I was like that temptation song, walking on cloud 9.

I’ve been talked about. Somethings have been true and some false. I’ve been loved and I’ve been disliked. I’ve been hurt by people that I thought really loved me. But I’ve also been uplifted by those that do love me. I’ve been encouraged. I’ve had people praying for me when I couldn’t pray for myself. You ask, “how do I know?” Because there were times where I felt my strength coming when I was physically weak.

I’ve had designer clothes, shoes, and handbags, luxury cars and 5000 square feet homes. My children have gone to private schools and we’ve traveled the world. I’ve had million dollar insurance policies and hundreds of thousands of dollars in accounts, banks and investment houses. I’ve had and I’ve lost.

I say all this to say I wouldn’t trade my journey. Every scare. Every pain. The ups and the downs have made me the woman I am today. I’m able to forgive people when they hurt me to the core and honestly still love them. The compassion that Jesus has placed in my heart sometimes don’t make sense. I don’t even understand it. But I’m so grateful for it. And as Philippians 4:12 says, I’ve learned how to be abased and I’ve learned how to abound. For this I’m grateful.

Control

I saw this and began to laugh. My husband and my children all think that I’m a control freak. Of course I think otherwise. So when I saw this it just tickled my fancy.

So if I’m looking for change why wouldn’t I take control? incredible change at that! Should I just take the back seat when it pertains to my life? My spouse life? My children life? Hmmm!! What say you? πŸ€”πŸ€”πŸ€”

Okay hey, I maybe a little controlling. Not in this sense that the message here is referencing. I do like things a certain way. I do want to know what’s going on with my spouse and my children. My babies are all grown but they are still my babies.

My baby boy even told me while he was on Christmas break, “Ma you just upset because you’re not in control no more!” He said this because he transferred to another school without my help and I was wanting to know where he was staying and who he was staying with. If he had toilet and household items. I wanted to know all the things that a mother is suppose to know. Is that controlling? πŸ€·πŸ½β€β™€οΈπŸ€·πŸ½β€β™€οΈπŸ€·πŸ½β€β™€οΈ Whatever!

Anyways, so yeah, just thought I’d come and write a little something something because this pic made me laugh. Controlling or no controlling I’m ME. I’m momma. I’m the wife. Don’t get it twisted. Be encouraged.

Help is on the way

What a week it’s been. I’m so grateful and thankful for my life. The good and the bad. The pretty and the ugly. I’m thankful for continued growth and strength. I’m thankful that my good days outweigh my bad days. Thankful for friends and family. Thankful for employment. Thankful for salvation. For wisdom. For love and compassion. I’m just thankful on this evening and wanted to share it with the world.

See some folks hide behind so much stuff. Some folks want to be things that they’re not only to win over folks that they don’t even need in their lives but their too silly to see it. I want to encourage you on this evening and let you know help is on the way. Be YOU. Be thankful for your life journey. The mistakes and all. For its making you if you allow it. Don’t regret nothing that you’ve experienced. Embrace it. Now I’m not saying to continue to walk foolishly but I’m saying when life knocks you down get back up. And do it quickly.

Set some goals for this week. Write them down. Take day by day. Visit your goals daily. Don’t be so hard on yourself if you don’t accomplish them all. The goal is to set some goals and diligently seek to accomplish them day by day. Focus on the internal more than the external. And work on YOU instead of worrying about others. Stay in the moment. Don’t give a lot of thought for the next day. And whatever you do don’t look back. And with that please be encouraged.

I will not be discouraged

You know I’ve tried to put my past behind me but for some reason every so often I get these suspicions that always end up to be REAL. I’m not that important but I really am. Regardless to what comes my way I ALWAYS overcome it because I’m an overcome, Duh!!

You know I get so tired of folks playing the victim. I guess because I’ve been guilty of doing the same. So when I see that spirit it vexes me perhaps because I see myself. So many people need mental help. I only know this because I’m getting help now myself. So the scale has been removed from my eyes and I’m seeing things for what they really are.

I learned in my 20s that messing around with a married man will get you nowhere. It profits you NOTHING. And I’ve also learned that to everything you do there is a consequence and/or an outcome. And you can’t play victim behind your actions.

It’s one thing to be young and silly but to be an old silly woman is foolish. It’s not cute. Ladies we have to do better. I know stuff happens and sometimes we get caught up. But when we do we have to bite that bullet. Stop playing victim and reflect on what you did and how you can not make that same mistake again. Stop playing victim. Stop looking for pity. Own up to what you’ve done and live with the consequences. Pray. Seek therapy. But whatever you do don’t try to hurt others. It won’t profit you nothing in the end. Remember man might not see you but trust there is someone way bigger than man that sees EVERYTHING. I see you though. And I’m praying for you.

This morning

I woke up this morning feeling different. I’ve been living in a state of fear and this morning I woke up feeling different. It was a feeling of “girl get it together”. It was sort of an odd feeling but I thank God for it.

Fear is such a crippling emotion. Once you fall into it you can’t even move or think right. You’re like frozen. There is a scripture in the Bible that says God didn’t give us a spirit of fear. I totally get it now. Without a sound mind you’re lost. I dont care how many degrees you have. How huge your vocabulary is. It doesn’t matter. You are not able to advance any agenda if you’re working in fear.

So I decree on this day that I will not walk in fear anymore. When and if it tries to return I’ll use the tools I’ve learned in therapy to overcome it. I’ll pray. I’ll meditate. I’ll journal. I’ll go for a walk or something but I will NOT stay in the state fear. I will NOT.

You know in life you’ll experience various things and guess what? That’s okay. But during or in the experience please make sure that you’re growing. Don’t become stagnant. Don’t let it make you bitter or angry. Fight through it. Life is not as short as people say it is. But life is very valuable. And if you’re able to experience it, do just that. Experience IT. Be open to the challenges. But don’t let it become a wave that takes you under. There are tools that can help you overcome what ever challenges comes upon you.

I encourage you to visit my blog and read these post. Come back whenever you feel the need to. I’m here to help and not judge. The word of God teaches me that we overcome by the words of our testimonies and by the blood of the lamb. So I don’t mind sharing with the world my testimonies if my savior will get the victory and if I can help someone. Don’t be out here thinking you’re alone. That’s a trick of the enemy to getting you feeling you alone. But let me tell you you’re not alone. Just this past Saturday I got so low I wanted to just sleep away, literally. That’s a dangerous place. I’m always in a state of encouraging myself and I’d love to encourage you.

Be blessed my beautiful readers. This too shall pass. And guess what? If you keep pressing your way hopefully you’ll see a new day tomorrow and you’ll be blessed with some new mercy and grace and that right there will be the strength you need to move on. Don’t give up and don’t look be. Be encouraged!

Why Me?

Why NOT me? I mean like really who am I? So I think because I’m educated I’m not going to experience any ups and down in my life? Or because I’ve seen the world I’m better than those that haven’t left the states. Or do I think because I wear beautiful dresses and shoes that I’m all that? Or check this one out, because I’m naming the name of Jesus Christ I’m exempt from going through?.. 😳😳😳😳. What the mess. I pray no one is really feeling this way. I surely pray not.

Inside you’re asking yourself why me, why not be thankful that you’re considered worthy enough to experience EVERYTHING that you’re going through. Why not count it all joy? Why not try to figure out the message and the lesson in it? More than likely it has NOTHING to do with YOU. You’re just the vessel that’s being used. These light afflictions that you’re experiencing regardless of how it my hurt is NOTHING compared to what Jesus had to endure at the cross. When I get into that “why me” mode I begin to think on what Jesus said, if it be your will Lord suffer this cup to pass, NEVERTHELESS, not my will but your will oh Lord. Get you a NEVERTHELESS down on the inside and watch how things begin to look different.

In my efforts to get my life situated after the last five years of darkness I’ve been really digging deep. It’s been hard and it’s been very lonely and emotional but I’m so glad I’m accepting and working through the process. Mental health is real. I dont care if you know Jesus, Buddha, Muhammad, or the Hindu Gods, if you are blessed enough to keep opening your eyes morning after morning you’re are going to be tried. And some of us is going to be tried like gold (if you don’t know the process of how gold is made look it up). But if you can stop being the victim and step back and look at things without pity you’ll begin to understand the why and the what. The plan will begin to unfold right before your eyes. You’ll sit back and begin to laugh because you see it for what it’s worth.

I know everyone is looking for a purpose in life. But when you get through searching come back and read this blog again. Your purpose in life is to help someone else. It’s NEVER about you. So STOP putting so much stock in yourself. You’re really not all that. You’re a vessel. And the sooner you accept that the sooner the clouds will open up and the burden will feel less.

I can’t leave this little nugget out. A lot of the stuff we are going through is because we won’t let go of these toxic relationships. 😳😳😳😳. Did I say? Yes I did. And I’m speaking to myself first. We want people to be who we won’t them to be when their not capable. They couldn’t be that person if they honestly tried. I mean think about it. You can learn new skills. Get a higher degree. But your character, morals, and values were created years ago. Those are probably not going to change at 50 years of age. Let go of those toxic relationships and work on your mental health and watch all that stress start falling out. It’ll literally feel like you dropped a heavy bag of books from your arms.

As always be encouraged. Pray. Seek counseling if you need some. Don’t worry about the nay sayers. They messed up too. Work on YOU. Stop trying to change people and/or the situation. Rest in your journey. It’s going to all work out.

I encourage you to read Shook One Anxiety playing tricks on me by Charlamagne Tha God. I just finished reading it the other day and I cried and laughed at the same time. You’ll want to work on you after reading this.

Stop Complaining!

Things happen. Life happens. And it’s so easy to get into a complaining spirit. I’m guilty of it myself. I’ve been through a lot. And when I find myself complaining I have to rebuke myself. Man Jesus has been too good to me to complain is what I begin to think. It’s so easy when things don’t go my way for me to start looking at all the things that’s going wrong. Then I start blaming folks for what they are or are not doing. When all along if I just take a step back and look at the grand picture I have absolutely NOTHING to complain about. Even with everything that’s going wrong I still have life. My mind is still functioning. I’m able to do for myself. Probably not like times past but still I’m able. It’s times like this where I have to stop and simply encourage myself. These little light afflictions that comes up in our lives are not for destruction. Focus I tell myself. Let it go! Be grateful. Be thankful. Jesus has been too good to you. Stop all this foolishness. And I begin to smile.

Isn’t it funny how our minds will just take control if we don’t bring it under subjection! You ARE totally in control of what flows through your mind. But you have to work at it. Don’t be so quick to cave into your mind when it’s taking you down stream. You know you’re blessed. You know it. So start controlling that ole mind of yours. You have it in you.

What do you do when you find yourself in a dump complaining about stuff? How long do you allow yourself to stay there? Talk to me. Be encouraged.

Change

I’m really working on me like never before. I mean I’m praying more. Going to natural counseling to deal with old demons that I’ve never confronted. I’m forgiving those that have hurt me and asking Jesus to help them. This is not easy but it’s needed. I wish I would have started years earlier but it’s okay. Better late than never. And guess what? Day by day I’m feeling better.

What are working on in your life? Have you forgiven those that have caused you harm? Even yourself? I realized I hadn’t forgiven myself for several things. But my goal is to walk in peace and love. I also realize I can’t live in those spirits if my inside is jacked up. And it’s been jacked up a long time. Looking at others and not looking at myself. So on today I encourage us all to look our own faults and others faults and see the need. Work on yourself. Press daily to be a better you than you were yesterday. That should be your ONLY competition. Be encouraged on today.